6th January 2013
This morning I was in distraught. I woke up a little bit earlier than usual and managed to get my breakfast before mass. I even had time to online. While scrolling FB, I saw a video of people killing goats. It was swift and methodical. No torture. One can argue that it's merciful because the animals do not suffer for a long period of time.
Knowing that fact did not make it any easier to watch. My stomach churned when I saw the goats being decapitated and bodies being flung to a side. Without their head, they were still moving their limbs and it was not a sweet sight to behold. My immediate reaction was condemning the people who were doing it. But thinking on a little bit more, their method, as I said, was quick and methodical. They did not meant to torture the goats. They meant to slay it. Maybe for food. Maybe for prayer. Maybe for something else.
It got me to think how I am similar to them by my actions. I am no vegetarian and I love eating meat. Pork, chicken, fish, venison, mutton, prawns, crabs etc. all taste so good. I am condoning all these killings by wanting to eat them. Am I any different from the people in the video? I was in distraught.
I walked for mass and was quiet, pondering what should be done, and what can be done. I couldn't think of an answer. I stepped into the chapel praying and lifting up my distress. We had a different priest today and I was eager to hear what he has to say, and thank God for him. He managed to give me a peace of mind through his preaching. This might sound bizarre (or stupid, depending on how you look at it), but what he preached gave me an answer to my questions.
Today we celebrate the Epiphany of the Lord, where the Magi visited Jesus in the manger. All these events happened through faith. They had faith by following the star. They had faith even though they were foreigners. The priest made a distinction between faith and religion. Many people have religion, but how many have faith? Real faith? And he said something which struck me, which was the answer to my distress:
"Faith means believing that God is making things a little better, regardless of how bad you think the world is. He is working little by little everyday to make the world a better place. That's faith."
Seems like my faith has diminished to such a level that I do not even realize that I am not putting faith in God anymore. As I grow older, there are more and more atrocities that I am aware of. I always wonder about the pain of other people (can't help it. It's in my profession :p) so much so that I am blinded by the wonders of this world. So much so that I waver in faith, wondering whether God is really helping. My faith has undoubtedly diminish. And today, God is speaking to me personally, when I am distressed. He really has His own method of doing things. How awesome.
This year, Pope Benedict XVI has touted this the year of faith. Not the year of religion, but of faith. The Pope asked us to do 3 things; to profess our faith, to celebrate it, and to witness it. We are professing and celebrating it everytime we go for mass, but the hardest is to witness. Today I am a witness to something great and I thank God for that. I would want to be a witness for other people as well. Thank you Lord.
God Bless~
Sunday, January 6, 2013
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Reflection of 2012
1st Jan 2013
It's the New Year and I think it's a good time for a reflection. 2012 has been a year of change. Big changes and I am going along fine with it I think. Came to the States to study my Masters in Counseling and it has been an ok journey. I still kinda miss my undergrad years though. It's a little different but I think things will change pretty soon when I am going to do my practicum and internship. I would want to be helping people :)
There are many many people whom I would want to say thank you to and below would be the list:
1) Suzanne Chong: I did not know anyone before coming to UNT. She provided me with lots of information, from GRE practice book, to applying to UNT, to coming to UNT. We weren't at all close before I came, and I think I bored her with my questions on FB message about UNT. However she has helped a lot and I wouldn't be here if not for her. Coming here made me know her a little bit more and she's actually a very bubbly, cheerful girl. It gave me a whole different perspective on her. Thank you Suzanne for all your help. I will be waiting for you to come back!
2) Louis - He picked me up from the airport. Absolutely no idea who he is, but well he picked me up :D Brought me to eat Chipotle and I didn't like it. Maybe I ordered the wrong stuff. lol. He helped me with shifting in and out during my first few days, drove me around to buy laptop and other necessities and I cannot thank you enough. Thanks Louis.
3) Tammy - for letting me sleep in her room while she was away. It was a good way to settle into a foreign place. She has also very boisterous and a good friend. Brings us to shopping once in a while and that's nice because I do not have a car. Thanks Tammy
4) Pao Kai and Yin Meng - The sweetest couple here. :D Thanks for always driving me to groceries shopping. I wouldn't be able to survive without the both of you. Well maybe I could, but it will be a very sad existence maybe. Haha. Thanks for the willingness to help out whenever I needed help with.
5) Shi Yun - The other Malaysian who is taking the same course as me. Thank you for helping me to settle into the course and lending me your textbooks. I wouldn't be as successful now if not for her assistance. Not to mention a lot poorer cause I need to purchase textbooks. :p
6) Ming Kai - The ex-president of Malaysian Student Association. He also helped a lot when I was shifting out from College Inn, and brought me to groceries shopping, whenever he is free. Since his house is the biggest around here, most of our parties are held at his place. From CNY to Deepavali. It's nice to have people around to mingle with during these times of festivities.
There are so many more people whom I would like to thank, for helping me transition. All the Malaysian friends here, Wen, Ying Zhi, Jennis, Kenny, Poh Lynn, Kumar, Victor and Annette, etc. ICSC members, Hitoko, Hsiu Shan, Mimi, Tiffany, etc. Volleyball gang: Will, Chase, Jared, Brandon etc.
Time to move on to 2013!
God Bless~
It's the New Year and I think it's a good time for a reflection. 2012 has been a year of change. Big changes and I am going along fine with it I think. Came to the States to study my Masters in Counseling and it has been an ok journey. I still kinda miss my undergrad years though. It's a little different but I think things will change pretty soon when I am going to do my practicum and internship. I would want to be helping people :)
There are many many people whom I would want to say thank you to and below would be the list:
1) Suzanne Chong: I did not know anyone before coming to UNT. She provided me with lots of information, from GRE practice book, to applying to UNT, to coming to UNT. We weren't at all close before I came, and I think I bored her with my questions on FB message about UNT. However she has helped a lot and I wouldn't be here if not for her. Coming here made me know her a little bit more and she's actually a very bubbly, cheerful girl. It gave me a whole different perspective on her. Thank you Suzanne for all your help. I will be waiting for you to come back!
2) Louis - He picked me up from the airport. Absolutely no idea who he is, but well he picked me up :D Brought me to eat Chipotle and I didn't like it. Maybe I ordered the wrong stuff. lol. He helped me with shifting in and out during my first few days, drove me around to buy laptop and other necessities and I cannot thank you enough. Thanks Louis.
3) Tammy - for letting me sleep in her room while she was away. It was a good way to settle into a foreign place. She has also very boisterous and a good friend. Brings us to shopping once in a while and that's nice because I do not have a car. Thanks Tammy
4) Pao Kai and Yin Meng - The sweetest couple here. :D Thanks for always driving me to groceries shopping. I wouldn't be able to survive without the both of you. Well maybe I could, but it will be a very sad existence maybe. Haha. Thanks for the willingness to help out whenever I needed help with.
5) Shi Yun - The other Malaysian who is taking the same course as me. Thank you for helping me to settle into the course and lending me your textbooks. I wouldn't be as successful now if not for her assistance. Not to mention a lot poorer cause I need to purchase textbooks. :p
6) Ming Kai - The ex-president of Malaysian Student Association. He also helped a lot when I was shifting out from College Inn, and brought me to groceries shopping, whenever he is free. Since his house is the biggest around here, most of our parties are held at his place. From CNY to Deepavali. It's nice to have people around to mingle with during these times of festivities.
There are so many more people whom I would like to thank, for helping me transition. All the Malaysian friends here, Wen, Ying Zhi, Jennis, Kenny, Poh Lynn, Kumar, Victor and Annette, etc. ICSC members, Hitoko, Hsiu Shan, Mimi, Tiffany, etc. Volleyball gang: Will, Chase, Jared, Brandon etc.
Time to move on to 2013!
God Bless~
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)